Can you change your type?

Men are a funny thing - well actually so are woman at times - but I've been pondering on the whole dynamics of meeting that ideal chappy (if there is such a thing!).

Dating is a funny game, you meet with a stranger, talk about your life story and then argue over who pays the bill. Then there's the whole arranging a next date or having to avoid the subject if you don't want a repeat, and then the goodnight kiss -urgh, awful! Then you either wait for them to call - or pray for them not to if your not interested! Its no wonder there's so many books written about it!

Actually getting a date in the first place can be quite tricky, I've become a bit picky it would seem in my late twenties. After quite a number of dates since I've been single I'm starting to lose faith - the guys who ask me out are never the ones I'm interested in, don't get me wrong, some of them are lovely guys but they don't tend to tick the right boxes for me- and of course as sods law would have it, the ones that you do want to ask you don't!!!

Now I do have a type, I didn't think I did until I realised that all the men I seem to go for look scarily alike! I was quite alarmed when I realised this - I've always gone for the pretty boy type but unfortunately those pretty boys tend to have egos the size of Norway (or somewhere else that's pretty big!!!!). It got me thinking that maybe I should change my type - and is that possible?

I'm starting to sway towards the idea of a big rugged MANLY man, someone who'll pick me up and carry me home after too many wine spritzers, then put up a few shelves and re-hinge the bathroom door before bed! I want a man who'll go to play rugby on a Sunday morning and then return home to cook me up a roast dinner and top up my wine glass as soon as is half empty - not swig his Fosters can, burp loudly and then scratch his arse like so many men!

But where do you meet such a man? I don't imagine they hang around in the cocktail bars me and my friends frequent to drinking Mojitos and commenting on the decor! They're more than likely rustling up a BBQ (that they built themselves) or in B&Q buying new power tools and drill bits!

From now on I'm on the look out for a proper man - one who makes me feel ladylike and dainty and what you see is what you get. No more men who straighten their hair and go to tantastic every weekend, not someone who's idea of a top weekend is to see how much he can drink before he throws up and is intent on seeing how many girls he can snog for the sake of it - come on boys, its not just the ladies who need to show a bit of class from time to time!

So next time I'm in B&Q buying my anti freeze - the only thing I can think I would possibly go in there for, I might pay a little more attention..... would skinny jeans and kitten heels look totally inappropriate in there????

My friends....I'd be nothing without them!

I've been thinking alot recently about friendships and the people in my life. When my last relationship ended I really thought I'd never get over it and the gap in my life would be too large to fill but I've really surprised myself in the last few months.

Its true that in testing times you really do discover who your true friends are and recently I've realised how damn lucky I am and that without these friends in my life, I really don't know how I'd have coped.

My friends are the most important part of my life and I do love them whole heartedly. When I'm feeling down they pick me up, when I want a good night out they're ready and raring to go, if I need a good talking to they'll give it to me straight, and if I've had a fashion crisis they'll say "oh lady no"!!!!

So although break ups are hard and its been a bumpy ride, I've also had some amazing times, some of my best in years in fact! I'm in no hurry to get into a relationship, I'm not sure where I'd find the time and I'm not giving up my girly nights out for anyone. So sure, we do spend much of our time slagging off men, joking about recent bad dates (and sometimes good dates!), or even men we've met that seemed to be just lovely and keen but turned out to be complete weirdos - girls take note, never go on a date with a footballer!!! - but ultimately we have a fantastic time. We know each another so well and we never have a bad time together.

So me and one of the girls were talking the other day, we're both single and have been through a lot together recently and we realised something. Why do we chase the idea of meeting a man when our lives are so full anyway right now? Why does the notion of 'soul mate' have to apply to a boyfriend? Why have we been instilled to think that meeting a man will complete our lives? I have everything I need without one. We tell each other how fabulous we are all the time, we confide in each other about everything, we're in contact everyday and know exactly what is going on in each others lives, and we tell each other we love them on a regular basis. When I think about my friends I smile, I look forward to seeing them, even if its only been a few days, I feel totally relaxed and at ease in their company and I know I can get through anything life throws at me with them in my life.

So yes, this is a slightly sentimental posting but its something that is very close to my heart. I recently went to a training session with work and as an introduction exercise we had to choose from a pile of pictures and postcards one which appealed to us and represented us in some way. I chose one that was covered in lips - all in different chatty expressions. You then had to present to the group about why it represented you and they had to monitor your body language and analyse the words you use. I spoke about being a chatterbox and how communication was of huge importance to me, I spoke about my friends and my family and what made me tick. When they gave me the feedback it was a real eye opener. Apparently when I spoke about my friends I used the words 'fabulous', 'incredible', 'absolutely' and 'fantastic' and I put my hands on my heart and often put my hands in a prayer position (and I never pray!). I was told I spoke passionately and honestly and I wish my friends had been there to see it!!!!

So really the moral to this story is, never neglect your friends. Men (and women) will come and go but your friends are always there and they help shape us all. Mine are the true loves of my life and they are so important to me. So away with the notion of soul mates only being in partners, here's to friends being the new soul mates, men can be used for occasional dating and the obvious, friends are for everything else.

I love you.................you are all totally fabulous!

Another boozy night out!

So another Bank Holiday weekend over and, dear lord, I think I better start looking into liver replacements coz this one can't have many years left in it!!!!

Saturday night we went out to celebrate a mates birthday, we knew it'd be a drunken affair....it always is when us lot get together! So we start the night in a classy bar, sober and respectable! The next thing, my mate pulls out a miniature bottle of whiskey from her handbag and pours it into her (already large) glass of whiskey! Her bag had seemed heavy - and it explains the clunking noise that was coming from her on the way to the bar!

"Well it costs a bloody arm and a leg in here....I thought I'd bring my own"

After deciding that some cheap drinks were in order we battled over to the cheapest bar in town.... so we stuck to the carpet a bit and there was vomit by the fruit machine...who cares, with triples for £3 its a result!!!!

So the alcohol was flowing and the conversations and laughter got louder and louder, the birthday boys eyes were getting glassy and the sugar from the alcohol shots were giving everyone an E number frenzy!!! The night was in full swing!

So we moved on to a cocktail bar - now I make that sound posh but really all we wanted was cheap Sex on the Beach (Ooeer!) and some Tequila Sunrise so where better than Cucamara...if you want to get drunk, that's your place! We'd only been in there 5 minutes when one of our party threw up all over the floor! As he turned to us to finish his drink and wipe his mouth some poor unsuspecting bloke skidded in the whole lot....we shouldn't laugh, but oh we did!!!! I knew I shouldn't have bought him that last WKD!

Now anyone that's been on a night out with us nutty lot will know that as far as conversations go on our nights out, nothing is out of bounds, so when one of the ladies started talking about transvestite porn I think a few of the less regulars got confused and a little disgusted....poor girl suddenly found herself stood alone with people whispering and pointing in her direction. They failed to hear the beginning of the conversation, she was merely talking about an email someone had one sent her that got her in heaps of trouble- but bless, she was branded as a weird sex fiend for the rest of the evening! And don't get me started on the cleavage obsession that then started!

So as the night went on it became clear that birthday boy was VERY DRUNK - he gave it away by announcing every 3 minutes that;

"I'm veeeeerry drrrrunk, have I told you all I love you and that I'm veeeerry drruuunnk"

So what to do but go for a 2am curry!

As 10 of us piled into the local curry house you could see the faces of the waiters fall - 'bloody hell, I'll never get home now with this lot'. Birthday boy ordered 2 beers (both for himself - one which we had to confiscate!) and everyone concentrated hard on the menus - probably because the alcohol had made our eye sights a little hazy and everything appeared to be printed in double and italics!

We attacked the food like it was our last meal but low and behold the birthday boy ended up with his head in his plate fast asleep - but would occasionally wake up to say;

"waiter can I have another beer.....I'm veerrryyy drrruuuunnk"!!!

So we ordered taxis and eventually, to the sigh of relief by the waiters, made our way home.

As we said our goodbyes we asked the birthday boy, who was now being held up by his exasperated fiancee (bless ya honey), if he'd had a good night

"Oh yes.....

..........................but i'm veeeerrrrryyyyy druuunnnkk"!!!!!!!!!!!!

Girly Myspace Layouts